5 years of education converging on this point in time...

 I picked up my regalia this morning.  Is it bad luck to see the official garb before the official graduation ceremony?

I really don't care.  This is the culmination of a 5 year education goal:  1 year of Gen Ed for all of those science, math and stats credit I needed to take, 2 years of undergrad in Communication Sciences and Disorders, and 2 years of Speech-Language Pathology.  I had to try the whole kit and caboodle on as soon as I got home.

Although, I have no idea how I am supposed to really wear the hood.   Check out the sleeves - those are different, too! 

Okay so I am not great at the whole selfie picture thing.  I certainly don't have the practice for it.  But check it out.  I graduate with my Masters this month!

Love Magnet speaks up. Watch out.

Pensacola Beach, Florida, January 2012

The Love Magnet has been harder to understand this year.  Her speech is somewhat garbled.  I think there must be a disconnect somewhere - is her brain running faster than she is able to express?  Or is it that she hears her peers speaking faster and tries to match their speed at the expense of being understood.  Whatever the reason, I've tried to work more with her on articulation.  It has been an interesting journey.  Mainly due to the reason that I can't be caught at being the teacher - rebellion would ensue.

The boys have picked up on the articulation models I have been using and started using them as well.  when The Love Magnet attempts to articulated /s/, they will point out that they can see her tongue.  "Hide your tongue!  I see your tongue, put it back in your mouth".  Alternately, when she attempts a /th/ sound, she ends up substituting with a /d/.  The boys will model where her tongue goes and then tell her it is her turn.  She complies with much more enthusiasm for them than she shows for me. When her entire sentence is unintelligible, they will let her know.  "Whoa, I didn't understand that.  Say it again, but this time slow down."  She is very willing to clarify to them, particularly if she is requesting something.

I love that the boys have picked up on this without me requesting it of them.  They are also learning to be more careful of what words they say and how they say them.  I've said it before and I'll say it again:  Heavenly Father sent The Love Magnet to our house to show us how we sound to each other.  She can mimic tone and inflection in speech with absolute clarity.  It is very obvious who she is mimicking and the offensive party ducks their head in shame when they recognize that they are the ones being imitated.  Worse, she picks up new words with lightning speed, particularly words we don't want her to repeat.  We've discovered that it is more than twice as hard to train her out of a bad word than it was to get my boys to stop saying a new word they learned on the school playground.  Read this post.  It was the most mild of words we didn't want her to say.  It took all the next year to train her out of it.

Here I raise my glass (of water) to old words said with more clarity and new words that aren't offensive.  And most of all to the power of the examples of sibling and friends.

My daughter is watching and listening to you.  Please be kind to each other.

Grad school: community screenings, time crunch, random thoughts

Tonight I was signed up to do community screenings.  I headed to the school to pick up an audiometer, print a map, and off to the other side of town.

The building was set up with all the disciplines the school provides: Nursing, Pharmacy, Dietitian, Counseling, SLP/Audiology, and Dental.  There were tables for vital signs, HIV screenings, nutrition, Rx check, lab work, dental checks, and hearing screenings. 

The hearing screenings were difficult due to the noises in the room from the HVAC, refrigeration system (there was a commercial kitchen in there), and the conversation from the other tables.  But we made do. Otoscopes for visual check of the ear canal and ear drum.  Tympanometer to check flexibility of ear drum, and hearing screenings.  Raise your hand when you hear the beep and say Hallelujia!  (No, not really.  Raising your hand is just fine.)

The screenings were for anyone, but mainly aimed at those in the community who couldn't afford health care.  Unfortunately, there wasn't much of a turnout.  I'm not sure if it was due to location or how well the community was informed.  The volunteers mainly sat around, or went to the other tables to check out the other disciplines.  My classmate and I had great conversations with counseling and dietitians.  Pharmacy came over to our table for screenings.  There were tables full of pamphlets on everything from immunizations to additional service referrals. 

The more I work in community screenings, the more I work in elementary school screenings, the more I work in clinic, the more I love this job.  The only drawback - there are days when I don't get to see my children much.  Twice a week, I get home just after dinner. I miss my family.  At least I know that this schedule won't be forever.  Once I graduate, I can work my schedule to fit theirs and be home when they get home from school.  In the meantime, when I am home, I am home.  I am theirs.  I crack open my books after the youngest ones go to bed.  I shut my laptop when the older ones want to tell me about their day.

I can do hard.  2 1/2 semesters, 1 internship, and 1 externship to go.  Can I see the light at the end of the tunnel?  I dare say I do.



Update to Swimming to the Surface

I just scored a very decent A- on my huge project #1 for Language Development. Feeling like I am going to survive grad school after all. At least this week.

Excuse me while I do a happy dance. Feel free to dance with me. Pat me on the back. Give me a woot-woot. Its all good.

Swimming my way back to the surface

Overwhelming. That pretty much sums up the first half of my first grad school semester.I'm still not caught up with all the reading, but then all of my classmates have admitted to the same thing. I love clinic - absolutely love it. The paperwork threw me for a loop. I believe I have the worlds best clinic supervisor because she has been beyond patient with me. My grades aren't stellar. I still have a chance to pull them up.

Finding my balance of school and home has been hard, too. The kids have been patient. The older help the younger with homework. Mr. Wonderful has also gone above and beyond to help this home run. Sometimes we see each other coming and going. At least we still make sure we have date night. We don't even sit by each other in church anymore. I'm at the organ. Since there is always a rest hymn and no special musical number, I stay up by the organ so the transitions are smooth.

We did celebrate Down Syndrome Awareness Month at the Buddy Walk. This year was more special than others. The Love Magnet danced a hip-hop number with a local dance group. She loved it. The best news (and still makes me teary whenever I think of it) is that this particular dance company has asked if she would join them. She'll be put in dance classes with typical kids. We're signing up in November. We had to wait a few weeks because -

The Love Magnet had a tonsilectomy/adenoidectomy. Her tonsils were huge and stinky and starting to cause bad breath. If was a rough first week. I called for help and angels came in the form of my parents and Grandmother. These three angels made it possible for me to make it to clinic while they stayed home with The Love Magnet. They did my laundry, reorganized my pantry, vacuumed, cleaned my kitchen, and spent time with my children. I felt loved and cared for.

I think I will make it through grad school after all. I had my doubts.

Countdown to grad school

Titres, skin tests, CPR certification. All the stuff I didn't know I needed to have before grad school is now messing up my trip-to-Utah plans before school starts. Grad school also wants my immunization records. As another 40-something classmate has also found out, we can't get those records because they no longer exist. I've had a few booster shots in the past two years that will count, but it looks like I will need a few more.

I've spent over $500 on textbooks for this upcoming semester, including 5 books for neurology alone. I love neurology but I will admit to some apprehension of the seeming insurmountable workload from that class alone. I need to pay tuition this week, too, and give information on my insurance for my SHIP waiver.

Kids school supplies have been purchased as well as most of the school clothes they will need. Still waiting anxiously for information on meet-the-teacher night as I still don't know who they will be.

Slowly things are being checked off my to-do list. I will admit to a small bit of anxiety in the realm of "Can I really do this?" But I know that this goal of grad school is a righteous goal and I will have all the help I need to accomplish it. God is great. He will not leave me alone.

I've been marveling at all the huge milestones our family will see during my two years of grad school:

* Firstborn has an interview this Sunday to be ordained an elder after which we will start marking off the checklist of everything to be done before his mission. He can turn in his papers in November. He'll leave for his mission sometime in February. He is hoping to serve in Africa like his grandparents.

*Secondborn will turn 16, be ordained a Priest which will allow him to bless the Sacrament. He will also start driving and dating (in my church, dating doesn't start until you turn 16). If you ask him which one he is more excited for between driving and dating, he will certainly tell you driving.

* Thirdborn will turn 12 and be ordained a deacon, which will allow him to pass the Sacrament. This is a big deal and he is so excited at the thought.

These are huge milestones in my church and my kids are really looking forward to them. Here is to the next two years. They will be monumental.

Bachelor of Science, Communication Sciences and Disorders

Giving my stole of gratitude to the man who help me the most, lifted me higher, strengthened me, and believed in me. And he is darn handsome, to boot.

Walking across the stage felt like pageant walking (head up, shoulders back, don't forget to smile and make it look natural, DON'T TRIP!).

Lots of cheers and "GO MOM!" and woot-woots.

Being thrilled for myself and my sister CSEDers (Dave, you also count as a sister CSEDer, brother). We worked so hard for this!

In awe of my family's love for me.

In awe of the extravagant flowers they presented to me as I walked out with my fellow students. Whoa, does a tiara come with this?

Wishing my parents could have been there. They will be in two years when I get my M.S.

Things To Celebrate

ISATs (Idaho Standard Achievement Test) was underway last month. Moms know the drill: make sure you kids get a good night's sleep, a good breakfast, and be sure to send them off with a positive attitude.

I remember taking standardized tests by filling in bubbles on a paper test using a #2 pencil. No longer. My kids take state standardized tests on the computer. They are immediately given their scoring when they are done. Not sure how I feel about my elementary kids seeing that score. At least I wasn't sure until last week.

Thirdborn came running home to announce the news: "MOM! I scored 'Proficient' on my Language ISAT!" My jaw dropped. This is the kid who was diagnosed with dyslexia, disgraphia, Audio Processing Disorder, and a Language Disorder. He has been in language therapy with the school's SLP since he was diagnosed. He just scored 'Proficient' and he wanted to celebrate.

I talked to his resource teacher yesterday. She confirmed that he did indeed score 'Proficient' on his Language ISAT. She took him around the school to let him share his news to all those who have been working with him. This is a very big deal. So tomorrow (when we all have an hour) we shall celebrate ISATs. Thirdborn wants to go get a milkshake at his favorite place.

Firstborn competed at the Idaho HOSA (Health Occupation Student Association) state competition last month as part of his Sports Med program. His PSA video won first place at the state competition and will be taken to nationals this summer. If he wins, the award is scholarship money. He is thrilled just to make it to nationals. Also, Firstborn just got a job(!) as a developmental therapist. Turns out, having a sister with Down syndrome, a CPR certification, and experience from all the volunteer work he has done with DS foundations and Special Olympics makes him very marketable as a DT. He is thrilled to have a decent paying job with benefits. He has no time to celebrate, so that will have to wait when he graduates from high school at the end of the month.

I get to celebrate Mothers Day on Sunday, graduate from ISU on Monday, and celebrate my 20th wedding anniversary on Tuesday. Might as well start the party now. Today is Cinco de Mayo. And my twin sister's 22nd wedding anniversary.

Uncertain Future and Tender Mercies

I've been quietly avoiding my blog for specific reasons.

Uncertainty. Pity party. Frustration. Worry.

I've prayed for months. I've gone to the temple. I've tried to have great faith.....and then wondered if I didn't have enough faith.

Trying to sell myself to grad schools has been a trial. I sent grades. I sent what I thought was a great letter. I sent good GRE scores. I sent my heart in three cyber envelopes and one snail mail. All in hopes that some university would say "We like you! We really like you!"

Vanderbilt sent a lovely rejection letter. Seriously, it oozed southern charm. I was slightly sad but not too much because that was my long shot. I was over it by the next day.

Florida State sent me a terse rejection email. I was devastated. I thought I met all their criteria. It was a great school and really close to my Georgia grandmother (as in I could head over there for Sunday dinner and spent days off hanging with her. I would have loved that opportunity!) It was a hard blow and I really grieved.

Then I worried. What if no one wants me?

The University of Utah sent a rejection letter. I don't think they ever received my GRE score. I tried to find out what was going on before the deadline, but the secretary I called was rather terse (every single time). I think she was having a bad day (week/month) and didn't want to mess with my problems.

Mr. Wonderful took me to the temple. We talked about what would happen if I didn't get accepted anywhere. After all, if three universities didn't want me, why would my own university want me? What then? Do I wait and apply again? Do I chalk it up to a great experience? We both knew that it was divine inspiration that I go back to school. I finally had to just put it all in God's hands. His plan is the best plan (isn't that what I have to keep learning?) I finally tried to humble myself and say "Heavenly Father, I trust you."

On April Fool's Day this came in the mail. But it was no April Fools:

My university wants me. I am going to grad school to become an Speech-Language Pathologist.

I AM GOING TO GRAD SCHOOL!

I shouted this to my entire neighborhood. Those who were out washing their cars heard me. I'm sure the angels heard me. I called Mr. Wonderful. I called my twin sis. I called my BFF who was so helpful when I admitted that the rejection letters made me feel .......well, not worthless but certainly not wanted.

My university has faith in me and I am so grateful to them for their confidence in me. The program is highly competitive to get into.

This morning I woke up with a reassurance that my Father in Heaven is well aware of me. We are definitely meant to stay here. Secondborn has a wonderful opportunity in an advanced high school. The programs available here for Thirdborn and The Love Magnet are so much better than other places we've lived. Firstborn will be able to leave for his mission from here (ohmiheavens, he leaves in less than a year!) The kids are relieved that we are not moving and that they don't have to leave their friends, teachers, and schools. There is a relief of not having to sell our house. I'm grateful that we'll be staying around our ward family, close-ish to our immediate family (well at least we can get there for weekends away), and I am beyond thrilled to be going to school with my classmates who are also kindred spirits and very much like sisters.

My future is more certain. I can't control much in my life,

but at least I know the direction I am going.

Scarehaircare: Future Clinician

After 3 1/2 semesters of observing in clinic (behind mirrored glass so the clients couldn't see me), I did something monumental today.

I stepped into the clinic as a student-clinician and took charge of part of the therapy.

Ohmiheavens

I LOVE THIS PROFESSION!

It was a little nerve wracking. I was more intimidated by the possible people behind the glass (Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain!") than I was the kiddo in front of me. I didn't have to plan the therapy (this time). All I had to do was take the graduate-clinicians notes and follow them. Nice ease into therapy. It. Was. Awesome.

Coming up later this semester: I have to plan and implement two half-sessions of therapy for the same kiddo and then one entire session. I'm looking forward to it.

Huge thanks to my graduate-clinician I am following around this semester. Before we went to retrieve kiddo and his mama for therapy, my graduate-clinician shared with me her most embarrassing first-time-ever experience as a graduate-clinician. It broke the ice for me and really eased up nerves I was feeling.

Pssst - I am excitedly/nervously awaiting any word from the grad schools I've applied to. Hopefully three very specific words along the lines of "We Want YOU!" will be arriving sooner than later.

Pssst again - HUGE CONGRATS TO ASH! She received word today that she was accepted to IOWA (only the #1 school for Audiology research in the entire nation!) Woot-woot, Ashley!