We had a laundry mishap with a green crayon. It hit the load containing my summer capris and shorts. So I had to go shopping.
With my kids in tow.
What was I thinking?
Does anyone in their right mind go shopping with children?
I dragged them into the women's section so I could find pants. The Love Magnet immediately had a yelling fit (with her brothers who were teasing her). *sigh* I mentally apologized to the store for my children's behavior, grabbed TLM and the capris I wanted to try on, and ducked into a dressing room. The Love Magnet insisted on locking the door. Door doesn't lock. I put my flipflops under the door so everyone could see it was occupied and started trying on clothes. TLM tried to open the door in the middle of my undressed state. It turned into an aerobic workout: pull on pants, dodge to shut the door, check mirror, shut the door, trip against the door trying to shut it while taking off pants......The Love Magnet thought it was great fun.
I finally found what I wanted, grabbed my daughter and escaped the dressing room, hoping no one saw that it was me.
Now to shop for boys. That is easier than shopping for me.
This was the first time I let Secondborn loose in the teen section. I told him to look for two pairs of shorts that fit. He must have thought I said 6 pairs of shorts and 4 shirts. That's what he gave me to purchase. I told him he had to put most of it back. My mild mannered 2nd born started arguing with his mom in the middle of the store. Shocking. And a big no-no in our family. Discussions are supposed to be conducted quietly. Instead it became a Shakespearean soliloquy. Passers-by must have thought it was an advertisement to the local Shakespeare festival.
When on earth did my sweet twelve year old become a dramatic, argumentative teen?!
Thidborn immediately piped up that if Secondborn got new clothes, that he should get new clothes,too. He proceeded to grab shorts much too large for him. I guided him to the right size.
"Those aren't cool, Mom."
I explained to him that he could not wear shorts that would hang low and expose his underwear. We finally agreed on shorts that fit and passed his coolness test.
When we got up to the sales counter, we discovered an extra $100 worth of shorts and shirts in our pile of purchases. The Love Magnet had decided to not be left out of the fun, and had pulled clothing indiscriminately from the racks. The sales help graciously helped me to pare down my purchases (the sooner to get me out of the store, I am sure) and ran through her 'use our credit card to save an extra 20%' spiel. We escaped with little dignity left.
Everyone is now taking naps so Mom can have some alone time. Mom needs alone time.
I'll let Mr. Wonderful come along. He prefers to shop for himself.