Tuesday, March 04, 2008

I didn't post a Sunday Gratitude list and I am starting to feel guilt about it. With the news of DD's heart surgery I think I am going through the grieving steps that I was told I would have when she was born. It never happened then but it sure is happening now with a vengeance. First was shock which lasted the weekend. Grief was yesterday. I broke down in front of the Resource head in the hallway at DD's school. I ended up crying most of the day.

Now I am onto anger. I'm not angry at God - His plan is perfect. I'm not angry at the doctors. I'm angry at the school district for putting my family through the past month and a half of pain and anguish. DD still struggles with her new aide. I have found out that they are not telling me about behavior issues at school. There are many issues that I want to bring up with the district. I'm looking into legal help right now. IF the district is willing to give DD's aide to another mom simply because that mom wants it, what is to stop them from taking other things away from my daughter to satisfy the desires of another parent. I am put-on-the-boxing-gloves mad. This whole problem at school has gone too far and I am not going to take it anymore. I have too much on my plate with our latest news.

I need a happy daughter.

I need serenity.

I need to express gratitude.

I will think about it today and post gratitudes either tonight or tomorrow. I don't want to make a quick list. It needs to be more than that.


Kimberly said...

Recipe for feeling better when life gets stressful:
1. Grab Maisy and take a brisk walk or a jog.
2. Clean something! I know it sounds crazy but there is something calming about putting your energies into a good deep cleaning session.
4. Treat yourself to a healthy dessert. (Make sure it's low fat or you might feel worse than when you started)
5. Take a deep breath and remind yourself that you are the best mother that sweet little girl could ever ask for.
6. Know that your brother and sister are praying for you and that we love you.

Val said...

I still can't believe the school district and what they did to you. It's just not fair and unfortunately DD is the one who has to pay the price. I know the surgery will go well--I just know it!