This has been a roller coaster week. I've given a great deal of thought to my gratitudes today.
First of all I am so grateful for Mr. Wonderful. We stayed up half the night talking. He held me while I cried and admitted my worst fears. I haven't cried like that since I was 7 yr old. Mr. Wonderful has such a calming influence. He helps me to think in a completely different direction. Together we decided not to sue the district. While I still believe that what they did was wrong, I need to focus all my energy on DD's upcoming surgery. Mr. Wonderful pointed out that every day with her is a gift, that every success she has is more than we ever expected. God's plan is perfect. I just need to "let go and let God".
Today I had the kids with me in Sacrament meeting. Mr. Wonderful was sick at home. The chapel was so crowded due to a missionary send-off that there was no where for my kids to sit except up in the choir seats with me. While the sacrament was being passed, DD started to get loud. She wanted to color and we have a rule that there are no quiet activities until after the sacrament is passed. With DD getting upset I thought I would have to leave the chapel (with all those eyes on me). Instead I pulled out a small pass-along card my church puts out. It had a picture of Jesus leaving the tomb (the same picture you see at the top of my Gratitudes today). I whispered in DD's ear about Jesus giving us the first sacrament and how we must be reverent to show that we love Him. DD quit struggling and started to listen. I kept whispering in her ear for a few more minutes about how much Jesus loves her. When I was done she turned around in my lap to face me and put her arms around my neck. DD kissed me softly on the cheek and said "Thanks, Mom." Sometimes I wonder about my daughter. It seems her wisdom is too great for her little body. I am so grateful to have her in my life.
I'm grateful for my church family. They have been praying so long for my Utah house to sell. Now, as word gets out about DD's surgery, they are adding her in their prayers. I have had so many offers to help with my sons if the surgery happens during the school year. Others have asked if I needed help getting things planned and ready. One even offered to take over my ward chorister job (and she isn't even in my ward). I'm grateful that I have people like this surrounding me.
I'm grateful for prayer. I've prayed more than ever this past week. I've had a testimony for years that I know God loves me. I have felt His love for me and my family this week.
I'm grateful that our kids illnesses have not been severe. Everyone is starting to feel better. I'm even more grateful that I have not gotten sick. Its hard to be the Mom when I'm to sick to take care of everyone else.
I'm grateful for good TV. On Sundays we watch Extreme Home Makeover. We used to have to switch channels fast of turn the TV off when EHM was over and before Desperate Housewives came on (what genius though of stringing those two together?) Now the network has Oprah's Big Give. Its nice to be able to find something clean to watch. I miss TV when I was a child. The Wonderful World of Disney followed by Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom followed by The Osmonds. My whole family would gather. We had a huge patchwork pillow my mom made that four kids could lay on, one child on each side. We popped huge bowls of popcorn and made orange juice. Good memories.
I'm grateful for the peace I've felt for three days now. I hope it lasts.